Unforgettable Past

On friday night I just had a fight with the whole family. Why is everybody opposing me in the family? What does it mean as family actually? I don't know. I feel that I just have parents who only care about their business and money. Everything is money! Money makes the world goes round. That's right. Nowadays parents don't try to understand what are their child thinking. As long as we are wrong they'll scream our heads off!

That night was a terrible night that I couldn't forget how much I hate my parents, including my brother. I was doing my homework given by Ms. Kala. The clock struck at 8pm. I kept wondering when are they going to go for dinner. As I was thinking, suddenly they shouted me out for dinner. I replied their rude way of summoning me. But seems like they didn't hear it. They got all fury, so was I! Then because of that my dad gave me a 'lecture'. What was wrong?

As they said, they called me for many times, but I didn't respond. From what my ears could hear, they only called me for the 2nd time! How can they just scolded me for this misunderstanding?! I tried to explain and tried to make them understand what was going on. But who knows, they don't even want to listen and they are right, as usual. They gave me a good lecture and made their own conclusion that it's all my fault. And my brother said that last time he was just like me, but he couldn't learn anything like that, so he asked me to change my attitude! Don't think you are elder and so-call all grown up then you can just give me a lecture too! Shut up! The greatest thing is my parents still can talk about their business while this thing isn't all settled! I cried silently in the public. I couldn't stand the hatred and the pain in my heart. My family is entirely changing. I no longer recognize them...

This morning I saw someone posted an interesting post on Facebook. I told ZhiKang the truth about the girl he loves might have a boyfriend already. Sorry ZhiKang, I didn't mean to make you all sad and so depressed. I'm sorry... But if don't tell you the truth one day you'll found out too. And that time I guess, you are so into her until you'll have a major break down that time when you knew it. As Chinese saying, "长痛不如短痛". I really don't want to see it when you have that major break down that I couldn't imagine. I truly am sorry for you.

And now you made me think of Ming. How awful... == Why would I suddenly think of this past...?! I wanted to forget it but seems like it's difficult. Can anybody just kill me?! I don't want him to remain in my mind and my heart. I can't move forward with him remain as the saddest memory... If we can't be together, then just kill me... Please!!! He is in my mind, that I keep thinking of him and having illusions of him by my side. He is in my heart, that I kept feeling that he still loves me and having illusions that he haven't forgotten me. I can feel his existence everywhere. If this continues, I don't know what will my future be... I really have no idea how can I move forward...

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